Madison Leigh

Eight years ago today, Scott and I began the very BEST journey of our lives ... parenthood! Without a doubt, Maddie has kept us on our toes and brought us more joy than we could have ever imagined ... I thank God every day for bringing her to us!

Today was FULL of fun!  It started early with a trip to the Waffle House for breakfast. Then, just a few hours later, it was off to Hot Wheels, a local roller rink, for Maddie's birthday party ... everyone she invited was able to attend and she was THRILLED!  Finally, we headed home for a family gathering and ... at this moment ... Maddie and Annie, her "cousin" and friend, are fast asleep after a BIG day of FUN!

Of course, Maddie's birthday is another vivid reminder of why I am fighting this fight ... and, as tough as it is at times, it's days like these that make it completely worth it!

Here's to celebrating Maddie for another 50 years ... or more!

Christmas Blessing

Today is Christmas.  It is a day to share special memories with friends and family and, more importantly, to celebrate Jesus' birthday ...

This year, Christmas has even more meaning for me than in years past.  Just a few days ago, I was blessed with a Christmas gift like no other ... proof of my excellent response to treatment and just weeks away from CANCER-FREE!  Without a doubt, I have Jesus Christ to thank for this amazing miracle.  So, although many wonderful gifts were exchanged today, I am most thankful for the gift I was blessed with ...

Here's to a PERFECT Christmas ...

Happy Birthday, Jesus ...

Five Down ... Three To Go

Today, for some reason, was a VERY emotional day for me.  Typically, although the days are long, things run rather smoothly and I am able to laugh and enjoy the day ... as much as possible.  This morning was different ...

Everything started off as usual ... blood work and a routine appointment ... then off to the infusion lab for treatment.  Since I started a new drug ... the side-effects are different and I was very apprehensive about it all.  Taxol can cause an allergic reaction ... shortness of breath, hives, back pain ... and I was dreading the possibility.  As a precaution, I was given Benedryl intravenously.  About 30 seconds after it entered my vein, I felt really strange ... almost like I was having an out-of-body experience ... I didn't like it AT ALL!  And, to top it off, I was still completely stressed about the possibility of a reaction to Taxol.  So, the tears started flowing ... and I just couldn't stop.  For me ... this is not the norm ... especially during treatment.  Finally, after the infusion began and I had NO REACTION to the medication ... I felt more relaxed!

Overall, it wasn't all that bad ... MUCH shorter in terms of infusion time ... only 3 hours instead of 5 1/2 ... YEAH!  And, much less anti-nausea medication and fluid ... which makes me feel better!

ROUND 5 ... DONE ...

Tonight, I spent the evening feeling a great deal of relief ... I have only THREE MORE treatments ... everything I am doing has a PURPOSE ... and IT IS WORKING!  Thank God!

Here's the proof ...

THE PROOF ... click for a closer look!

This report was given to me this morning ... and it contains, in doctor lingo, the information from yesterday's mammogram and ultrasound.  Begin reading at "Ultrasound demonstrates ..." and keep in mind, CR stands for "complete response" meaning there is nothing visible via ultrasound ... 

I cannot express, in words, how thankful I am to be responding so well to treatment.  I will admit, chemotherapy is NOT fun ... but, as I have said before, I will do WHATEVER it takes to become a SURVIVOR ... it is absolutely worth it ...

So, raise your CORONA to having only THREE ROUNDS TO GO and, more importantly, to GREAT RESULTS ...

ONLY THREE LEFT!

Here's to answered prayers ... and a VERY MERRY CHRISTMAS ...

Christmas Gift

As many of you know, Scott and I headed to Emory this morning for an appointment in the Breast Imaging Center.  At this point, I am half-way through chemotherapy and have completed the first of the study related medications, Cisplatin.  So, I am required to have a mammogram and ultrasound to measure the progress of my treatment ...

Well ... I have received the VERY BEST Christmas gift possible ... NO TUMOR CAN BE DETECTED BY ULTRASOUND!

Here's a peek into my morning ...

I arrived at my appointment ... early ... and was taken back for a mammogram, although they took only two pictures initially.  A few minutes later, I was brought back in for an additional four images.  Finally, it was time for the ultrasound.  The technician spent several minutes looking at my lymphnodes and the location of my tumor ... she could find nothing.  So, she called for Dr. D'Orsi, Professor of Radiology, to take a closer look.  He confirmed that my lymphnodes remain clear ... good news!  More importantly, he was able to locate the marker that was placed at the time of my biopsy, but was unable to locate the tumor ... even when comparing it's exact location to my previous ultrasound images.  Of course, this doesn't mean there are not still cancer cells present, but ... there is NO TUMOR DETECTED ON TODAY'S ULTRASOUND ... which indicates significant SHRINKAGE ... and proof that my treatment is working VERY well!

On the way home, Scott and I were talking about the results ... obviously VERY pleased!  We have both felt strongly, from the very beginning, that God led us to Emory ... to Dr. O'Regan ... and to this trial ... and, I am so VERY thankful!

As always, thank you all for your continued prayers and support ... there is NO DOUBT ... God is listening!

Here's to ROUND 5 tomorrow ... and kicking MORE cancer ass ...

Hustle & Bustle

This time of year is always VERY busy ... baking, shopping, wrapping ... doing it all to prepare for the Christmas season.  Over the past few weeks, I have been going through the motions ... doing everything I can to enjoy every minute of the hustle and bustle ... but, this year, it is difficult to find the excitement ... the peace I once had ...

Of course, at this time next year, I hope to be looking back and giving thanks for FINALLY being CANCER-FREE and enjoying life again ...

For now, though ... my next treatment is looming ... and, for whatever reason, I am especially worried about the side-effects.  More than anything, I want to get through these next few weeks without any long-term, lingering effects.

One thing I know for sure ... I will be losing my hair!  Luckily, it isn't permanent ... and, although it is something I am NOT looking forward to, one of my dear friends, Tim Martin, gave me a new perspective ... something I really hadn't thought about ...

Tim lives in Indianapolis.  His wife, Kathleen, and I are the greatest of friends.  Since moving home from Indiana, we have deeply missed the Martin family, but have managed to see them at least once a year over the past five years.  This week, Tim sent me a message ... hoping to make plans for a summer gathering.  Of course, for me, the summer would be perfect ... I will be finished with treatment, feeling MUCH better, and I won't be completely bald ...

This is what he wrote ... "When you look in the mirror, you may see bald.  As for me, I see strength and courage ... and a big middle finger to cancer."  Surprisingly, I have always thought of my being bald as an embarrassment ... to myself, my husband, and my children. So, these words brought tears to my eyes ... but also a smile ... maybe bald isn't so bad ...

Thank you, Tim ...

Pray

Well, it's been almost a week since I have had any desire to write.  This past week, for whatever reason, has been emotionally draining for me.  At times, I still feel like I am trying to wrap my head around it all ... and it's not easy ...

For several days, I have been looking for something to ease my mind ... and bring out the smile I know is hidden somewhere deep inside.  Today, I found it ... in a song ... by, of all people, Justin Bieber ...

Pray - Justin Bieber

Yesterday, Maddie was given the perfect gift ... Under the Mistletoe ... Justin Bieber's Christmas album.  So, this afternoon, we were headed to Mammie's house and just HAD to listen to it on the way ...

I am SO glad we did ...

The very first song to play was track 14 ... Pray.  As I sat in the driver's seat listening to the lyrics ... I actually felt a lump in my throat and tears filled my eyes ...

I know there 's sunshine behind that rain

I know there's good times behind that pain

I close my eyes and I can see a better day

I close my eyes and pray

Although I am embarrassed to admit that Justin Bieber's music moved me to tears ... I am excited to finally feel some relief.  I know, in my heart, that better days are very near ... I just have to stay positive ... knowing that, before long, I will have my life back ... and it will be bigger and better than ever!

Here's to JB ... 

Preserving Innocence

This morning, I received an email from Maddie's teacher.  She mentioned that Maddie finally opened up to her about my treatment and is concerned about the medicine I am taking and how it makes me feel.  This, for me, is heartbreaking ...

All this time, we have been working so hard to keep things as normal as possible.  But, obviously, things are different ... and Maddie recognizes the change ...

After our talk the other night ... I do feel better about her willingness to talk ... and I hope she continues to do so.  For now, though, I would love for each of you to stop and say a prayer for my children, specifically Maddie ...

I DO NOT want this experience to strip her of the happiness she deserves ... from the innocence of childhood ... I do, however, hope that my strength will serve as reminder to her that anything, however big or small, can be overcome ... with hope ... with love ... and with faith!

This, too, shall pass ...

Here's to preserving my baby's innocence ... as long as possible ...

Four Down ... Four To Go

Finally ... I am half-way to the finish line ... and it feels SOOOO good!

Yesterday was another long day, but better than the day of my last treatment.  I was able to move more quickly though the process and was home in time for dinner ... without the nausea!  Of course, I mentioned my previous experience to Dr. O'Regan and Kate and they made some changes to my anti-nausea medications ... and it did the trick!  I continue to be amazed by the effectiveness of my treatment ... in every aspect ... thank God for modern medicine!

Round 4 ... DONE ...

I wanted to blog last night, but decided instead to relax and enjoy a warm fire and my nice cold Corona! So, that is exactly what I did ...

ONLY 4 LEFT!

My next treatment is scheduled for December 22nd ... just a few days before Christmas. From what I understand, the new drug I will receive, Taxol, causes less nausea ... YEAH ... and, overall, is less difficult in terms of side effects ... I am VERY grateful for that! Hopefully, I won't be feeling too badly when Santa arrives!

Best of all, I am beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel ...

Thank you all for your continued support and prayers ... for the cards ... for the meals ... for every little thing that you do each day to bring a smile to my face ...

Here's to the being half-way to CANCER-FREE ...